Mar 14, 2021 5
Addicted.
3-15-21
I have a friend who once – in fact frequently – talked about his wife. “Unburdened himself,” to use an old and somewhat curious phrase. Complaining? Actually, no. We all need someone we trust on whose shoulder we can cry, or at least provide a pair of ears now and then.
Counselors charge a lot of money; sometimes a good friend is all we need.
Anyway, his story was about a marriage where his wife chain-smoked; and then gave it up. Then she took up drinking to embarrassing excess and disappearances and blackouts. And then she quit, cold turkey. I am forgetting the order of these problems, but in between there were various drugs; and then no drugs. She also cheated on my friend on and off – more often “on,” that is, serial affairs. He knew that his three children were not his. If you wonder about bulimia and anorexia, you’re right: those too.
The first time I heard this long litany of his endless heartache and her virtually suicidal pastimes, I asked why he didn’t leave her; get a divorce.
“Because I love her,” he said.
I could end this essay there, because there is a spiritual message, or at least a picture, or a parable, or example, somewhere in there. Maybe like the story about the boy digging through a pile of manure in the belief that “there must be a pony in there somewhere!”
Maybe. Surely there are elements of unconditional love and forgiveness in his story. My friend was not a Christian, yet he reflected some of the ways our Heavenly Father treats us.
… or (we hope and pray) that He treats us.
We all have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God. We know that because the Bible tells us so. But do we believe it because we genuinely know it? How often do we change the tense and to reflect that “we all sin and fall short of the Glory of God”? — that is, we still sin. But if we have accepted Christ, the “falling short” of God’s Glory cannot be measured any more.
After all, “while we were yet sinners,” Christ took away the punishment that our sins deserve.
“Because I love them,” Jesus would say.
I want to dwell a moment on how much we are all like my friend’s wife. Yes, all of us, in all ways. She was addicted – to this, and that, and the other. Serious, deadly, ugly, dangerous, smelly, stupid, harmful. In truth, it was not nicotine or alcohol or sex or cocaine. She was addicted to being addicted.
And so are we all. We know some of our habits are bad, yet we remain in them. We apologize to enablers… yet hope they will continue to enable. Are serial cheaters looking for the perfect match, or are they in love with being in love, as if they really know what that means?
Our addictions – our continuous problems and failings; our weaknesses; our broken promises to others and to God – can be summed up in one word: sin.
We all have heard stories of people breaking from the grip of specific addictions. Haven’t we? I pray you have heard such testimonies from people. The percentage of deliverance from various addictions is astronomically higher in faith-based programs than from secular therapies. No surprise: if addictions are a reflection of a spiritual problem, they can only really be healed by spiritual means.
I want to leave you with one more thought, as, possibly, your mind is racing through the challenges you have, or a friend or family members has, or an experience you survived. We know Jesus taught us to pray, “Lead us not into temptation,” words that we realize are almost a confession of our weakness.
So we do pray for things like losing some desires we have; or that we be gifted with a stronger will; and reminded to live responsibly. In other words, how often do we think the best place, with God’s help, is to be in a spiritual place, a morally responsible position, where we can say, “OK, God! Thank you! I’ll take it from here!”
That is not spiritual maturity. It is spiritual self-delusion.
Our Heavenly Father does not want us to be independent. Everything in God’s Word, all the lessons of saints and martyrs, the many works of Christ, point to the truth that He desires that we be dependent.
Spiritual maturity is when we confess our inability to save ourselves. Christianity can be defined as achieving victory through surrender. No other construct works that way. We cannot dance and jump for joy and run to embrace the Lord except while on our knees. Neat trick, but it’s God’s plan. He is not as much impressed by our deeds as by our obedience.
Jesus performed miracles, and God still performs miracles. We know that the earliest recorded miracle of Jesus was turning water into wine at the wedding feast. The songwriter T. Graham Brown wrote a song during the “lowest of lows” of his alcoholism. It would be a miracle, drunks know, to be freed from the desire to take that one more drink – miracle enough. But he cried out uniquely to save his life: Could God just turn the wine back to water?
A miracle is a miracle! And that perspective actually admits the dependence – at the end of a spiritual rope (have you ever been there?) – instead of seeking a miracle, maybe as a crutch.
Despite our strengths or weaknesses, deliverance is the real miracle, however God takes us there. But let us pray that we can be enabled by the Holy Spirit to invite one more addiction – to be addicted to God’s Word and God’s Will.
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Music Vid: “Turn the Wine Back Into Water”
Every few weeks, some guy hacks the music-video link. WordPress is not helping us. Either hit “refresh” a couple times, or cut and paste this URL — the song is worth watching! (Also for some readers with hand-held devices) Copy and paste link: ) https://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=nKTdbqcjogg
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